I know calling myself a “beauty queen” might be a stretch — but honestly, that’s how I feel. Looking back at who I used to be and how I presented myself, that title doesn’t feel like an exaggeration. To me, it’s the perfect way to describe the glow-up I’ve worked so hard for.
I have three brothers — two older and one younger (who, funny enough, now looks older than me and is much bigger than me). I grew up playing sports with them, racing down the street, watching their shows, and of course, wearing their clothes. They didn’t care what they looked like; they threw on a T-shirt and gym shorts and felt great. So I thought I should feel great doing the same.
For years, I walked around in my little brother’s size-small T-shirts and gym shorts. I literally wore that outfit in middle school and felt fine — until I didn’t.
In high school, something shifted. The girls around me looked more feminine. The guys looked more masculine. And for the first time, I felt like I didn’t belong. I wanted to feel like a girl — and look like one too — but I had no guidance. I didn’t have an older sister, and my mom, who was raised around boys, couldn’t help much in that department. All I had was the internet — which led me to some very questionable outfit choices I would never want living online forever.
Picture this: extremely curly, puffy hair full of frizz. A face full of acne. A too-thin body wearing an oversized, faded T-shirt, the tightest, wrong-wash skinny jeans, and the most tragic sneakers TJ Maxx had to offer. No accessories. No perfume. And no confidence.
Around sophomore year, something clicked. I wasn’t bullied or shamed — I was just uncomfortable. For the first time, I wanted to be feminine. But we didn’t have much money, so a full transformation felt out of reach.
The truth is, my transition from tomboy to beauty queen was slow, emotional, and at times really difficult. But by the time I hit college, I was ready to reinvent myself. Here’s how I did it:
1. I Took Better Care of My Skin
Acne was my biggest insecurity. My dream was to be one of those girls who could wear just concealer, blush, and mascara — and still feel beautiful. So I made that a reality. I started taking hydroquinone for my acne, did laser treatments for scarring, and committed to a real skincare routine. Today, I am that girl who can throw on minimal makeup and head out the door.
2. I Revamped My Closet (Slowly)
I didn’t have the budget for a full makeover, so I built my wardrobe piece by piece. I learned some basic style rules (don’t wear tight tops and tight bottoms, balance loose fits, and work with colors that suit my skin tone). A simple trick that helped a lot: stop wearing jeans and leggings for a while. It forced me to find more polished, feminine alternatives that made me feel more put together.
3. I Started Wearing Jewelry
I eased into it — first earrings, then necklaces, then rings. Wearing jewelry became a small but powerful shift in my daily appearance. It made me feel elegant, intentional, and yes, more feminine. I’m still learning how to wear bracelets and watches, but even the smallest accessory now helps me feel more like me.
If you are just starting out and looking for an affordable yet stylish set of earrings to test things out with, get the same set I started with on Amazon here! https://amzn.to/4jwxt0D
4. I Chose More Feminine Activities
This one might sound small, but it was transformative. Instead of masculine-coded workouts or environments, I started taking tennis classes. I swapped sports bars for stylish restaurants. I cleaned up my vocabulary. All of these subtle changes helped me step deeper into my feminine energy every single day.
5. I Read More
I know it sounds random, but reading changed everything. Whether it was self-help, psychology, or finance, reading made me feel interesting. And I’ve learned that being smart and curious is incredibly attractive. Books gave me confidence, conversation starters, and a more well-rounded sense of identity.
6. I Worked Out
I’ll never stop talking about this one. Exercise completely changed the way I view myself. It didn’t just improve my body — it shifted my mindset. There’s something about sweating that makes me feel strong, capable, and yes… beautiful.
Final Thoughts
My transformation didn’t happen overnight. It was full of trial and error, awkward phases, and self-doubt. But with every small decision — better skincare, a more thoughtful outfit, a finished book, a consistent workout — I got closer to the woman I wanted to be.
I may not be a literal beauty queen, but I feel like one now. And that’s what really matters. If you’re on your own journey, know this: it doesn’t matter where you start — it matters that you do start.
The glow-up is waiting for you, too.